Turn off the dark.

Poor Fawn was sick last week.  Just your typical winter crud, but it's no fun.  He was feeling so lousy that he had trouble sleeping, which is very unusual as Fawn loves his sleep (he's even been known to throw up in his crib, not make a sound, and go right back to sleep -- disgusting!).  Last week the sleep didn't come easy, though, and I spent many a dark hours holding my little one.  Fawn is so used to sleeping all night that he didn't quite understand why it wasn't morning.  He repeatedly asked me to "turn off the dark."  I wish I could have sweetheart -- and I wish I could have turned off the fever, the sniffles, and the coughs too.

I caught the crud too -- and let me tell you, it was yucky.  One of the very few things I miss about life pre-Fawn is the freedom of being able to lay around when I am sick.  It's hard to be a caregiver -- let alone be up all night giving care -- when you really just want to be left alone (or better yet, have someone care for you).  I think it's one of the hardest parts of motherhood.  It's pretty similar to morning sickness in that you can't do anything to change your situation.  When you're pregnant, nothing makes you feel better (trust me, I tried it all) -- you just have to get through it.  And, when you're sick with a child, it's the same thing.  Grin and bear it -- and know that you will bounce back eventually (though definitely not as quickly as you did when you could lay in bed, drink plenty of liquids, and watch TLC all day).

I've only been sick since we've had Fawn a couple times, but each time it's rough.  It makes me so thankful for Buck's help and support -- and so thankful we've got family in town to be there in a pinch (huge kuddos to my fabulous mother-in-law for accompanying us to the doctor this week and cleaning up the vomit that Fawn deposited all over me in the waiting room and again in Walgreens).  I seriously don't know how single moms and people without family around do it!